Mark Hayward Is My Hero

The proof is in the picture. Last Friday I got to perform at the annual banquet of the Greater Pittsburgh Magic Network (GPMN), and it was in a real, live castle. Ok, it was a modern castle, and it wasn’t alive, but still.

First there was a close-up show, then dinner followed by a stage show. Since I am new to Pittsburgh no one knew me other than Paul Gertner, who had invited me. Paul was the headliner, so he thought it would be fun to have me come up as an innocent volunteer as part of one of his bits. It was really fun. We planned it so that Paul and I each had a yo-yo, he was telling me how to use the yo-yo to complete the magic trick, and then I showed him up with my yo-yo skills. It was pretty funny. After it was clear that I was a shill, Paul introduced me and I did a routine. It’s always great to be the juggler at a magic show since no one else there does what you do, and thus are not already bored by it.

It’s weird being at a magic show with a bunch of magicians. They don’t clap at the same time as a normal audience. For one thing, they know how a lot of the stuff is done; and for some of the tricks they clap when the secret magician thing is done somewhere in the middle of the trick, not at the ta-da moment at the end when the rest of us clap.

There was a mentalism trick done at one point, where the guy on stage asks for an audience member to pick a “magic” number. Then he takes a marker and fills in some seemingly random numbers into a big 4×4 grid that he is holding. The thing is that the numbers all add up to the “magic” number when you add them together in rows, columns, corners, diagonals, etc. It’s a good trick. What made it totally surreal for me was that as soon as the “magic” number was picked, the guy sitting next to me took out a pencil and his program and started racing the guy on stage to get the numbers of the grid written down. I still don’t know how it’s done (and that’s how I like it), but by itself, the pencil race next to me was really amazing.

I have only lived in Pittsburgh since August, and I absolutely love it here. Like anywhere though, there are some problems, and for the most part they are very minor. When we moved here people were complaining about the potholes, but it really didn’t seem bad to me at all. Well, that’s because it was the middle of summer. Now, at the end of winter the potholes are ridiculous. I am not exaggerating when I tell you that some of them are 12 inches deep. It’s unbelievable. It has gotten so bad that it actually changes traffic patterns and the way people drive.

I have had locals tell me that the city can’t fix them in the winter because of the cold. That’s baloney. I have seen pothole crews out in the winter in Illinois, Wisconsin and Minnesota, and two of the three have WAY worse winters that Pittsburgh. Another pal told me that the potholes don’t get fixed because the city is so broke. That I can believe, but I hope they get it together soon, or I’m going to start thinking there is a conspiracy between the city and the auto mechanics. At one shop I even saw a “Pothole Special” that included wheel alignment, brake check, tire rotation/inspection, and a shoulder to cry on. (Ok, I made up the part about the shoulder.)

Although there is still a long way to go until we are back to smooth sailing, yesterday I noticed that the two craters on my block had been filled in. Yay! Spring is here!

I can’t believe it. 66 degrees! From now on I’m changing the phrase to, “I think I’ve died and gone to Pittsburgh.”

I mean seriously… this is incredible. This is supposed to be the time of year when we suffer in the cold, all bundled up in layers, and I was out walking with my dog in the park in short sleeves. I didn’t think that Pittsburgh could get any better than it already was. I like winter, and I’ve always said that I would love to live in a place that has a real winter, but maybe just one that’s not quite so long as a Wisconsin winter. Now it seems that I have accidentally found such a place. Today we broke the record of 64 degrees that was set back in 1998. Amazing.

Over the weekend my wife and I went to a great craft fair in Pittsburgh called Handmade Arcade. One of the vendors that really caught my eye was a t-shirt printing joint called SquidFire out of Baltimore Maryland. They have a great, unusual take on deep-sea creatures, and they have all kinds of stuff with giant (or regular I suppose) squids all over it. There are other images besides sea creatures too….

I’m spending a long weekend with my cousin and family in Leonia NJ. Today we went to the bakery, and were met at the door by the largest pile of butter I have ever seen. It was awesome.

Worth Their Weight in Butter: My Cousin Scott and his daughter Frances at Balthazar Bakery in Englewood NJ

I had a shockingly good chocolate chip cookie, and we brought home a giant, and delicious, loaf of bread.

Other highlights so far:

• didn’t get lost on the way here
• played a surprise game of soccer with my dog
• got yelled at by a NY cop
• juggled tennis balls representing the Jewish Matriarchs and Patriarchs for Tot Shabbat at the local Synagogue
• got recognized as being from Pittsburgh by the grocery bag I had the tennis balls in

Unfortunately I was not able to connect with my NYC juggler pals, but I’ve got a whole day and a half left in Leonia, so who knows what else might go down.

We’re still unpacking, although the end is now in sight.  Here is a photo of the best of the labels so far:

Only one of them refers to yo-yos.  Can you tell which one?

Yes, it’s true.  Just three days until Lenore and I move to Pittsburgh.  There is a lot of work yet to be done and I am tired.  Part of the tiredness might have to do with the fact that I drove almost 300 miles today, and it is currently 1:27 am.

This is WAY harder than ever before, and it doesn’t help that we have a dog either… or that we have standards now.

In case you haven’t heard or figured it out, we’re moving to Pittsburgh.